Even in today’s ‘modern’ era, there’s a double standard when it comes to sex and gender roles. If a woman wants to be sexy, she has to find that very thin line between appealing and ‘easy’. And if she’s too confident, throwing her into a category with the queen of femdom, the Dominatrix, she’s cast in another sexist light altogether. How do you escape the constant judgment and being boxed in based on societal rules that were supposedly negated long ago?

The Sex Prude

sex prudeIf you spend your life trying to be proper, keeping the hem of your skirt long and your cleavage covered, you’re probably seen as a prude. Maybe you even have an idea as to what makes others slutty or easy. Is it the way they dress or act? Are they too flirty? Maybe it doesn’t even matter because the minute you break away from your norm, you know you’re going to be judged and thrown into another category, so you’d rather just take the label your given and run with it. But just having a modest way of dressing doesn’t define your sexuality, does it?

The Sexy Slut

sex slutWe all grew up labeling some girl we knew as ‘slutty’, but did we ever define what it was that made her so? For me, it was the girl who wore a lot of makeup, a short skirt, developed early so she had large breasts when the rest of us were still flat, and blushed when boys talked to her. Now, that’s probably not a fair judgment of who she was, but it was the image I had in my mind. And the sexist attitude prevails today, not just with men but even more so with women. That’s part of the reason we need to assess what we’re thinking about others so carefully.

The Sexual Dom

sex dommeIt might seem like those women who take control in relationships have worked their way out of this cycle of labels and sexism, but that’s not true, either. In the world of femdom, even these women have a role to play, an assumed identity, and for many men, they are seen as interchangeable. Any woman who can make them submit is good enough to fill the role. It doesn’t matter what sort of submissive male they want or how they wish to be seen; they are still just an ideal in a sexist world.

Breaking Through the Sex Barrier

There’s only one way to stop this vicious cycle of labeling and judging, and that’s to simply be who you want to be, without concern for what others think. There will always be judgment, and the first order of business is to stop judging. When you can see others as individuals, it’s easier to be an individual and not limit yourself to the confines of roles created by others. And when those roles are eliminated from your mind, they will eventually disappear completely, leading to less of a sexist classification society.

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